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What to Do When You’re Left on Read, in 6 Healthy Tips

PHOTO: Allie Smith/Unsplash

PHOTO: Allie Smith/Unsplash

So you’ve finally worked up the courage to ask your crush for their number and text them. Waiting for your crush to reply is always agonizing, the time between their responses seems much longer than usual even though it’s only been five minutes. There comes a time when your crush leaves you on read, and you don’t know how to handle it. Being left on read by someone you had planned on dating can be stressful, and you’ll probably wish that you never started texting them at all. Asking someone for their number does take a lot of courage, and being left on read may leave you feeling defeated.

It’s hard to tell if someone actually read your message, especially if they don’t have their read receipts turned on. If you are using Instagram or Snapchat, you can see when someone opens your message. Just because they opened your message does not necessarily mean they took the time to read it. They could be busy doing something else and didn’t have time to construct a message. Of course, there are other possibilities but don’t always think of the worst-case scenario, which is they aren’t interested in talking to you. You never know if someone just forgot to reply to your message.

Don’t spend your entire day trying to analyze what may have gone wrong in your conversation. That will only create even more stress and will make you feel insecure about someone who hasn’t replied to your text message. Although it’s easier said than done, don’t let one instance lower your confidence and shy you away from texting another crush.

What to Do When You’re Left on Read, in 6 Healthy Tips

During this agonizing time, you’ll want to find things to keep you occupied. This is what to do when you’re left on read and some things to avoid. After following these steps, hopefully, you’ll end up feeling empowered and carefree.

Don’t Double Text

Sending another text is always tempting. You probably think it will catch their attention. It will catch their eye if you’re sending message after message. Being that person that continuously sends texts for no reason can make you appear to be desperate.

If you’re panicking after hours of no response, don’t start sending arbitrary messages to get a quick response. The best time to send another text is if you need an urgent response. If it is a time-sensitive situation, and you need an answer right away, then you can contact them again.

Identify Your Emotions

Whenever you are put in a nervewracking situation, you will try to find ways to make yourself feel better instantly. It’s a way to cope with your emotions without understanding where your stress is stemming from. This could prevent you from doing something you will regret like, sending a dozen meaningless text messages. Here’s what to do when you’re left on read and you don’t know how to process your emotions.

However, centering yourself is going to help you gather an in-depth analysis of how you are feeling. According to Relationship Expert and Spiritual Teacher, Baji Grace, “Fast care will shift the emotion, stopping it from overtaking your body and giving you a clear perspective.” Comprehending your emotions right away will help you manage your stress before it consumes you.

Reread Your Messages

If you are going to read over your message, do not point out anything you think you’ve done wrong. When you’re excited about your crush texting you-you fall into a weird state of bliss and stress. It’s blissful because you finally got their number, and you started a conversation with a possible partner. The stress stems from the possibility of them never texting back again.

Again, there are many reasons why people don’t text back. If you look back at your conversations and realize that the conversation was filled with a bunch of close-ended questions that could cause a conversation to fizzle out. A closed-ended conversation started doesn’t require a lengthy response.

Spend Time Away From Your Phone

Putting your phone away for hours is almost impossible if you use it daily. If you’re always on your phone, it will make checking your text messages or contacted them even more tempting. Eventually, it will cause more anxiety because you will still be thinking about whether they’re going to respond or not.

You will also try to figure out if they are still active on social media, and they probably are. That will only encourage you to dwell on the fact that they haven’t text back yet and make your day even worse.

So instead of staring at your phone for hours, you could occupy your time by hanging out with your best friend and talking to them about the situation. Talking to a good friend can help you diffuse your emotions just by having them listening. If you have a friend that genuinely cares about you, then hearing their opinion will be beneficial.

Look For A Pattern

If you've been talking your crush for a while and no matter how compelling the conversation is, they’re still inconsistent. Somehow you find your spiraling whenever this person leaves you on read. They take hours to reply, and you suddenly panic because you’re about to go through the same process again. Talking to someone should never be stressful or cause an enormous amount of stress.

When you get the chance to start a new conversation, try asking if them if they are serious about starting a relationship with you. It would help if you found some clarity in your relationship with this person. Transparency will help you decide whether this person is worth keeping around or not. But if they are matching the same efforts you are making; then you should let them go.

Promote Emotional Healing

If someone is no longer responding to your text messages, it’s easy to blame yourself. The conversation could have been going well, and they didn’t make time to respond. Don’t discourage yourself by lowering your self-esteem.

If it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, then they’re not the right person for you. You must take time to heal. And you may be afraid to do this again. Still, Baji Grace mentions that “Each time fear finds you, it's an opportunity to meet it with love” to encourage reassuring thoughts and diminish self-doubt. Fill your mind with positive thoughts about yourself whenever you are in a rut.