Sometimes you don’t want the world to know that you’re masturbating, and you want the most discreet vibrators you can find. Although I can see how a super loud vibrator might enhance a sexual encounter if you were playing with one or more partners; there are times whenyou just want to masturbatewithout your entire family, neighborhood, or partner (who’s asleep in the bed next to you) knowing about it.
A super loud vibrator can be distracting in such a way that it can get in the way of you getting off, and you don’t want tobe sexually frustrated, which is why it’s always good to have a couple your toy box.
Carol Queen, Ph.D., Staff Sexologist ofGood Vibrationssays, “Some toys are not shy about letting you know when they’re switched on. They announce themselves with a roaring — rumble then, if anything, they get even louder. Thankfully, there are plenty of vibes that are designed to be discreet in their noise level without giving up any of the power.”
It can be challenging to know if a vibrator is nosy or not before you buy them if you’re unable to try them out in a store. Emily fromAdult toy megastoresays, “In terms of working out whether a vibe will be loud or not when you’re buying online — generally, the more plastic it has, the louder it will be. If it’s waterproof and body-friendly silicone — it will be quieter. Silicone can act to insulate sound — so your best bet, if it vibrates, is to go for silicone. Waterproof also helps — as that means there could be extra insulation.” We searched high and low for the quietest vibrators on the planet, for your sexual pleasure.
Satisfyer Pro 2 Vibrator
$35 at time of publication
In the interest of journalistic integrity, I was fortunate enough to try all three of the Satisfyer vibrators, and they definitely qualify. The design of the Satisfyer Pro 2 is very sophisticated, modern, and is a pretty rose gold color. It’s smooth to the touch, nicely shaped, and has a hooded head that surrounds the clitoris.
The noise is minimal, especially once it’s in place. That inner chamber of vibrating joy prevents water, lubricant, and any other liquid from entering the device, making it extremely hygienic. Masturbating is one way that we canpractice self-love, so don’t underestimate its importance to your well-being.
Satisfyer Pro Traveler Vibrator
$40 at time of publication
This vibrator has 11 settings that range in intensity, Whether you’re feeling like you want some tender self-loving care, or you want a powerful blast of pulsating on your clit, has a setting to fit your mood.
The design is sophisticated and discreet. If it fell out of your pocket, no one would suspect that it was a vibrator — it looks more like an elegant lighter — but it’s not cigarettes that it sparks but amazing orgasms. Perfect for day or evening fun. If your mission is to see how many orgasms you can have in one session, this vibrator is the only equipment you need. Let the Satisfyer Pro Traveler be your guide on a trip to orgasmland.
Satisfyer Pro Penguin Vibrator
$33 at time of publication
This red bow-tied little guy fits comfortably in the palm of your hand (thanks to his ergonomic contours,) and like the rest of the Satisfyer vibrators feel smooth to the touch.
His easy controls, non-threatening design, and super quiet motor make him a great starter vibrator. But whether you’re experienced in sensual solo play or a novice, the Satisfyer Pro Penguin is a great option.
Red Hot Sizzle Vibrator
$51 at time of publication
CalExotic’s line of quiet vibrators is called Red Hot Teasers. I tried the Red Hot Sizzle. The design is unique. On one end is a curved teaser that provides intense fluttering stimulation, and the other end controls the functions of the vibrator. It’s body-safe, waterproof, and phthalate-free. It’s both compact and discreet with 10 functions of intense vibration, pulsation, and escalation.
The powerful motor in all the Red Hot Teasers is a mere whisper for those times when vibrator noise would spoil the mood. This vibrator manages to sizzle while being one of the quietest vibrators on the market.
Hide & Play Rechargeable Lipstick Vibrator
$27 at time of publication
If you love the super-spy gadgets in James Bond Movies or Melissa McCarthy’s “Spy” movie, then this is the vibe for you. It looks exactly like a lipstick but with a lot of power. It has a tungsten motor with a deep rumbling vibration that stimulates without a lot of noise. You’ll be surprised by how powerful that motor is and how many orgasms it will give you. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to ride wave after wave of sexual pleasure.
$79 at time of publication
Roxie isn’t the showiest sex toy, but it gets the job done — quietly and effectively. Roxie’s angled tip tapers into a ridge shape providing both direct stimulation and a broader angle for a larger base of stimulation. Roxie measures 5 inches in length with a diameter of 1 inch and has 3 intensities and 7 pulsation patterns, making it both petite and powerful. Don’t forget Roxie is rechargeable, waterproof, and ready to party when you are.
Iroha Plus Vibrator
$140 at time of publication
This soft-textured, cute, and library-silent vibrators are waterproof and rechargeable. They’ve been specifically designed to stimulate both the clitoris and the other external erotic zones. Since their design was inspired by organic shapes, they’re pleasing both to the eye and the touch. They have 5 strong vibrations speeds and 2 vibration patterns. Do they all qualify for being some of the quietest vibrators? Oh, oh, yes! Choose from three distinctive styles: Kushi (cream color) Tori (red) or Yoru (slate).
Lelo Mona 2 Vibrator
$140 at time of publication
Emily says, “Most of the Leo range is quiet, but the Lelo Mona 2 is particularly quiet. Despite being a mighty vibe — it’s surprisingly quiet. It proves that the quietest vibrators can be powerful and not sound like a garbage truck.” The substantial size (8.7 x 2.0 x 1.3 inches) and power make for a powerful orgasm and can keep you moaning all night long.
Fun Factory Stronic Surf Pulsator
$161 at time of publication
This is 8 inches of neon-orange fun. It’s a hands-free 8-inches of neon-orange thrusting power that’s nearly silent and still manages to hit all the hot spots. Emily says, “The Stronic Surf is a very cool toy — it’s a pulsator rather than a vibrator — only a very slight difference. It provides hands-free thrusting. The Stronic Surf thrusts back and forth on its own, in ten different settings, from a steady pulse to a wild rhythm, Build your arousal slowly, or head straight to the highest setting.”
The Amy Vibrator
$95 at time of publication
The Amy is at once familiar and yet new at the same time. It looks to me like an old-school vibe combined with a bullet-vibrator. Sexpert in training Lilli Hornyai ofSextoys.co.uksays, “Equipped with a host of functions, including the Svakom Intelligent Mode that imitates the build-up of intercourse from foreplay to climax, this G-spot vibrator is designed for ultimate pleasure. And, at less than 50 decibels, it’s quieter than a ticking clock ensuring discretion and all-around relaxing experience.” These are the quietest vibrators that you’ll use over and over again, and since it’s 100% green technology, you’ll feel good about it.
Eva 11 Hands-Free Vibrator
$130 at time of publication
Adina Mahalliof Enlightened Reality recommends Eva 11. “This best-selling vibrator from Dame is remarkable for many reasons. For starters, the hands-free device is surprisingly discrete for how powerful it is. It rings in at around 50 decibels but is virtually unnoticeable under the covers behind closed doors. The clitoral vibrator was designed to be tucked into your vulva under the labia and rest comfortably while delivering strong orgasms.”
We-Vibe Touch Vibrator
$99 at time of publication
Jessica Gordon, owner ofLUVOQA, says, “The We-Vibe Touch features a discrete motor for play and has a sculpted shape that easily fits within the hand. Its cupped, rounded tip is perfect for targeting pleasure points.” This vibrator has 8 vibration-patterns, is waterproof, and sculpted design. The We-Vibe Touch has a reputation for being one of the most quiet vibrators.
Je Joue Classic Bullet Vibrator
$59 at time of publication
This vibrator is made with smooth body-safe medical grade silicone, has user-friendly buttons, 7 vibration functions, and 5 adjustable speed settings. Jessica Gordon says, “This bullet vibrator is powered by Je Joue’s signature discreet rumbly vibrator, It also includes a finger sleeve allowing it to become an extension of your finger.”
Perla Vibrating Panty
$130 at time of publication
It’s a panty! It’s a vibrator! It’s both. This remote controlled vibrating panty is extremely quiet, waterproof, and has 5 unique vibrations. You don’t have to be home alone to have an orgasm — you can be at work or the grocery store.